Rudolph the French hippo has been kicked out of his own country and deported to the Ben Aknoun Zoo in Algiers where he will be joined by a hot mama from Madrid who will play Spanish guitar for him and dance around with maracas after which they will mate and start a new Algerian dynasty.

Rudolph the French Hippo

The 37-year-old Rudolph was intended to make the move with long-time Polish girlfriend, Pelagie, but she took one look at the sparsely furnished military plane and refused to board it. So Pelagie was shipped to a zoo in Hanover, Germany, where she has been promised lodgings with lots of orange, her favorite color. The French military has refused to comment on their failure to uproot one little hippo.

Rudolph was a bit stressed out by his trip, especially by all the guns he saw on board the military plane, as he is a gentle soul and abhors violence. Upon arriving, he immediately took refuge under the water and has refused to come out.

Algerian zoo officials hope that Rudolph will pop up soon as the Algerian public is clamoring to see him. Not to mention the $50,000 they spent to move him to his new home.